In the world of couples therapy, two names usually dominate: Gottman and EFT. Gottman is excellent for building practical skills, but it can often miss the deeper emotional work that drives our behavior. EFT goes deep into those emotions, but it frequently misses the concrete skills and fails to address the power imbalances or grandiosity that can quietly erode a partnership.

My approach is different. I am a psychodynamic therapist, which means I take an active, engaged role in our sessions. I don’t just sit back and observe; I am empathically confrontational. I believe that real change requires us to look at the roots of your struggle, which often lie beneath the surface.

While my work is grounded in psychodynamic theory, I bring in a Jungian lens to help us understand the "why" behind your "what." We’ll explore the shadow parts of your personalities—those traits we’d rather not admit to—and the archetypal patterns you might be unconsciously playing out with one another. By bringing these unconscious forces into the light, we can address the patterns of entitlement, avoidance, or power struggles that feel impossible to root out on your own.

I’ll challenge you to take responsibility for your own reactions and your own regulation. We’ll also get honest about the “bitter pills” of marriage: the realities that can be lonely, disappointing, or just plain hard. I won’t pretend that therapy—or relationship—is always going to feel good. Instead, we’ll work together to decide what is workable and what isn’t, giving you both the deep insight and the practical tools to do something about it.

A lot of couples therapy models miss the mark in different ways. Gottman is fantastic for teaching skills, but it often doesn’t get to the deeper emotional layers that drive our patterns. On the other hand, EFT really dives into those emotions, but sometimes leaves couples without the practical tools they need day-to-day. And honestly, neither model does much to address power imbalances, entitlement, or those subtle forms of grandiosity that can quietly erode a relationship from the inside out.

This is where Relational Life Therapy (RLT) stands out. RLT doesn’t shy away from the tough stuff. We’ll look directly at patterns of avoidance or entitlement, and I’ll gently—but firmly—challenge you to take responsibility for your own reactions and emotional regulation. It’s about developing both deep self-awareness and the concrete skills to do something different.

RLT is also honest about the realities of relationships. There are some “bitter pills” we all have to swallow—truths about marriage and partnership that aren’t always easy or comfortable. Sometimes relationships are lonely or disappointing. RLT won’t sugarcoat things or promise that everything will always feel good. Instead, we work together to figure out what’s workable, what’s not, and what steps you want to take from there.

No.

As a 100% Cash Pay provider, I can provide you with a receipt for services rendered, also known as a Super Bill.

However, it is important to note that I do not engage with any insurance company in ANY capacity, including documentation audits, chart audits, phone calls, etc. My documentation including my assessments and treatment plans are designed for the work we do together, and may not meet insurance standards.

For individuals who wish to have multiple sessions per week, insurance may not reimburse you for multiple units of treatment in a week.

It is your responsibility to verify your benefits before engaging in treatment; Grey Insight and Dr. Michael Grey are not responsible for and cannot guarantee that you will get reimbursed from your insurance providers.

My office is in Irvine, California.

However, Dr. Michael Grey is duly licensed and authorized to offer Telehealth services throughout Alaska, Arizona, California, Colorado, Florida, Idaho, Nevada, Utah, Virginia, and Vermont.

Atti Moricelli, AMFT, is authorized to provide services throughout California and has an office in Carlsbad for those seeking in-person sessions.

At this time, I do not. However, if we determine that Telehealth is not appropriate for you, we can discuss transitioning you to a provider that offers in-person sessions

As we begin your initial assessment, you may notice there will be quite a few questions. I truly appreciate your patience with this process! These questions help me gain a better understanding of your situation and determine how I can provide the best support for you.

This is a safe space; you are a human being, come just as you are.

The duration of our therapeutic relationship truly depends on the unique aspects of our work. Therapy isn't a one-size-fits-all experience. Some individuals find benefit in a six-month commitment, while others may choose to engage for several years.

As I always say, “You have been on this planet for X amount of years and have learned a lot of things; unlearning and processing all of that will not happen overnight.”

You have the right to receive a “Good Faith Estimate” explaining how much your medical care will cost.

Under the law, health care providers need to give patients who don’t have insurance or who are not using insurance an estimate of the bill for medical items and services.

You have the right to receive a Good Faith Estimate for the total expected cost of any non-emergency items or services. This includes related costs like medical tests, prescription drugs, equipment, and hospital fees.

Make sure your health care provider gives you a Good Faith Estimate in writing at least 1 business day before your medical service or item. You can also ask your health care provider, and any other provider you choose, for a Good Faith Estimate before you schedule an item or service.

If you receive a bill that is at least $400 more than your Good Faith Estimate, you can dispute the bill.

Make sure to save a copy or picture of your Good Faith Estimate. For questions or more information about your right to a Good Faith Estimate, visit www.cms.gov/nosurprises or call 800-985-3059.